A "Chit Chatty" Letter To Mom

Hi Mom!

I read a friend's blog yesterday. She had written a letter to her son who died in her arms moments after he was born. I can't imagine that kind of heart ache, can you? Anyway, I thought writing you a letter would be a great idea.

I sure missed you this last weekend! I gave Natalie a tea party birthday party for her and her friends on Friday afternoon. We used my china and my teacup collection and my nice stainless. I even had daffodils from our yard to put on the table! I made ribbon sandwiches, deviled eggs and a fruit tray. I think the whole fancy thing was lost on the girls, though. They were a pretty wild bunch. Even Natalie said the girls were too wild for her liking! :) Katie had a hard time missing you that night. Having a tea party reminded her so much of you, your love of pretty things and how we talked about having tea parties now and then since you'd be up here. She said she imagined you sitting next to Nattie with a cup of tea in a pretty tea cup. I had a dream that night that you WERE there, and that you enjoyed every minute of the tea party, and helped me set up and plan things for the girls to do. I believe that was God, letting me know that you saw, you enjoyed and maybe even had a cup of tea in a fancy teacup right at that time to be part of the party. :)

Saturday was cousin Rosalie's baby shower. Katie made a burp cloth and I made a towel and blanket. Rosie and Nattie had little gifts too. We took a gift from you, because you so loved attending the showers and celebrations of all our extended family. It was a beautiful sunny day. I let the girls pull out their Easter dresses "just this once" to wear. They all looked so pretty! The drive to Corvallis is one of my favorite drives, and I thought how you would have ridden along with us and how we would have had such a fun visit on the way there and back. Instead, I listened to the girls chatter in the back seat, and we had some fun conversations about the signs of Spring, and how we could see the 3 Sisters, Mt. Jefferson and Mt. Hood all at once. The sunset on the way home was gorgeous, and we talked about how God paints such lovely sunrises and sunsets. So, even though you were not physically with us, the ride and conversation with my pretty princesses blessed me. I was encouraged to be making and thinking of new memories we will create in this new life without Mom/Nana.

Cameron went on a ski trip with the youth group this last weekend. He snowboarded. He said it was fun, but he is SO sore! :) I almost quoted one of Dad's favorite sayings..."Those who dance must pay the fiddler", but decided his aching bod was doing enough to remind him of that! :)

Sunday night we had Dad and Kevin down to our house for a belated birthday dinner for Natalie. She chose Bruschetta chicken, spinach salad and cherry jello with applesauce in it. It was a yummy dinner and we topped it off with strawberry cake and ice cream. She opened presents and we watched some Olympics. It is fun to have Kev and Dad for dinner. I have invited them down about once a week since you've been gone.

Reid has been such a blessing to me lately. Not only is he my husband and my best friend, he is now also taking on the role of best girlfriend - at least for now, since you are not here. :) He's doing a great job of it, too, I must say! :)He has been a great listener, and is very understanding of my grief and my joy and the whole jumble of feelings I have with this brand new experience of living life without Mom. However, no one will ever quite fill your shoes, Ma.

It's Springtime! Or at least close. :) The daffodils are in bloom and the crocuses by my front door are peeking their pretty purple heads up. The Daphne by my front door is so fragrant! One can smell it all the way out at the street! My rose bushes, and yours too, have new growth on them. The cherry trees all over town are budding pink and white blossoms. You would have loved seeing all the Springtime color and growth! I can just hear you exclaiming over all the flowers and tree blossoms.

Cam will be home from school soon. I think I'll go start a load of laundry and make some chocolate peanut butter no bake cookies before he walks in the door.

I love you, Mom. I miss you so much. You were such a special lady. I'll see you soon, for as 2 Peter 3:8 says "....With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years is like a day." I'm sure I will write more letters to you. In a way it helps to be able to share the little things with you this way.

Loving you!
McSween :)