Where Did That Come From?

This morning I was listening to the first Carrie Underwood album. OK, yes, it's true. Once in a while I get my country on, turn up the country music, warble at the top of my lungs and dance and clean the house. Usually when no one is home. :) (But sometimes when they are, and then they just shake their heads, roll their eyes, laugh and say "Mo-om!" Or if it's Reid, he just smiles. :) )

But that's not the point of this post. Today I was standing at the sink doing dishes, listening to Miss Underwood, minding my own business, when all of a sudden my throat constricted, my eyes got wet and my lip quivered. What? Where did that come from?

Well the song that was playing was "Don't Forget To Remember Me". The one about when the person in the song (Carrie, I assume) leaves home at 18. And her mom is crying and prolonging the goodbye, giving cash, a map, a Bible. And all of a sudden I saw myself in that position. That's where the wet eyes, tight throat and quivery lip came from. Because I realized that in just two short years my oldest chick will leave the nest. (Unless of course he decides to stay here and go to school locally to save money, which of course is what I have advised him to do. :) )

At first I thought, "How silly of me! That's two years from now!" But then I remembered the same kind of thing happening in my house when I was growing up. I even remember my mom talking about it and feeling a little silly. But here's the deal. As adults, we realize how fast time flies. Especially as our kids get older and life gets busier. And two years seems like just a blink in time. I know it will go by just that fast, and I will be the one prolonging the goodbye, holding back the tears, pride glowing, heart aching, as we leave Cameron at whatever destination the Lord takes him to. Until then, may Reid and I cherish every laugh, hug, tickle fight, and wrestling match; capture the interactions with 'the sisters'; love on him like there's no tomorrow; teach him to be a man of good character; etc. ( and may we do the same with 'the sisters'!)

Keepin' it Real

Maybe I'm alone in this. Maybe not. I have an admission. I lack self- discipline and internal motivation. There. I said it. Like my title. I'm just keepin' it real. Think what you like.

Specifically, I'm referring to housework (Well, and phone calls. I abhor making business type phone calls. Ask Reid. I don't even like to call in for pizza. What's with that?!). We all have it. Housework, that is. Some of us are great at getting it done, some of us enjoy getting it done, some of us hate it, some of us never seem to be able to get it all done. Some of us try self talk like "Do it for the Lord! Do it well! Be thankful that you CAN do housework and have a well working body to do it with! Come on, self! Put on your happy-happy-joy-joy face and just get to it already!" I have friends in all of the above categories. As for me, I think I kind of enjoy HAVING it done, it's just the actual doing that I have a hard time with. And the finished product goes a long way in helping me enjoy it. But I have a hard time getting started. (Can you guess which category I'm in? Yeah, I try the self talk method a lot. Sometimes it works.)

One of the things I really miss about Mom is that she was such a great cheerleader and motivator. She'd call me up and say "Let's play the 10 minute game! Then I'll call you back and we'll talk." We'd pick a chore, work at it for 10 minutes then take a visit break. She used to play all kinds of little games like that. 10 minutes in the kitchen, then a little section in a book. 10 minutes in the laundry room, then polish her nails. 10 minutes dusting and cleaning, then 10 minutes writing letters. Etc. (I need to play more games like that with myself!)

Yesterday, I was telling my friend Jeana about how I missed Mom's help in motivating and cheering me on to get things done. Guess what? She knows about the 10 minute game! She and our friend Becky play the game sometimes when they have a project that needs done and they are having a hard time getting motivated. Sometimes they even take before and after pictures and send them back and forth. How fun is that?!

So when I got home from being with Jeana, I texted her and told her that I was going to play the 15 minute game in my kitchen, which was a disaster. (The fifteen minute game is very similar to the ten minute game. The only difference is that you get 5 extra minutes. :) ) I took a picture, texted it to Jeana, set the timer and went for it. This is what I started with. Remember - I'm keepin' it real. Sometimes, well lots of times, I have a messy kitchen. It drives me nuts, but somehow, it keeps happening.

 Here are the results of 15 minutes of work. Of course my peppy music helped!

Do you see the difference? Isn't it exciting? When I texted this picture to Jeana, she responded with "Wow! I can see a big difference!" That Jeana - she's such an encourager! With the motivation I received from the "Once begun is half done" theory, plus the encouragement from Jeana, I.... WANTED, yes, WANTED! to do another 15 minutes! So I let Jeana know I was going for another goal, set the timer for 15 more minutes, and then.......

Wow! Jeana said she was honored to be my cheerleader, and told me I did a good job. I'm a sucker for praise, so that was really helpful and encouraging. :)

The reason I posted this, and shared my real life messy kitchen, is that I KNOW there are some of you out there like me. I would be happy to play the 10 or 15 minute work game with you anytime. If you have my number, text me. If you're on FB, message me. Or hey - I could always use more cheerleaders - you could just cheer me on, whether you do some work too or not. :) Or maybe it will just give you an idea to try on your own. Do some work, then reward yourself with a SHORT time of something you enjoy. This makes housework fun and motivating, at least for me!

Sorry - I know there wasn't much depth or interesting writing in this post. Just a dose of my reality for ya. And now I'm going to set my timer for 15 minutes to fold clothes and clean up my bedroom (which has lots of clean laundry in it). Then I'll take a break and either read or (ssshhh!) play Candy Crush for a FEW minutes. (Emphasis on few, self.... FEW!) Onward! In honor of Mom and her little game! :)

Mother's Day

Mother's Day... who knew that those two words, that day could hold such a vast array of thoughts and feelings in my heart? I was somewhat overwhelmed and definitely unprepared for all the thoughts and emotions that I experienced yesterday surrounding Mother's Day....

Celebration: I love being a mom! I have been blessed with four beautiful children and a wonderful husband, and that is a blessing worth celebrating! I love our little family's tradition of planting something new each Mother's Day. For many years we have planted a rose bush each Mother's Day, in honor of generations of rose garden lovers in my family. Last year we planted a peach (or is it apricot?) tree, and this year we are planting a Japanese Maple tree. Fun!

Heartache: All the while I am celebrating my own little world of blessedness, there is an underlying knowledge that not everyone experiences the joy in motherhood that God has given me. Many women are unable to have children, and have walked a long road of infertility, and I grieve with them. Some women have had to give up their babies for adoption, and I ache for them. Some women have a child with severe handicaps that are a challenge to live with day in and day out - a source of heartache and worry and sometimes fear for their little lives. Those are brave and wonderful women, and their children are precious. Still others have lost a child in death, and I can't even fathom their grief.  (Disclaimer: Please, please forgive me if I have missed a kind of mother's heartache!)

Sadness: Oh, how I miss my wonderful mom. She was my best friend, my cheerleader, my confidant. She motivated me, she inspired me, she encouraged me. She was cute and funny and silly, always positive, and wise. She suffered her illnesses with grace and faith. She loved my children like only a nana can, and had special relationships with each one of them. What a gaping hole she has left in our lives.

And yet, I am mindful of the many friends I know who have a broken relationship or no relationship at all with their moms. And I wish I could have shared my mom with them.

Thankfulness: I am so thankful for the years I did get with my mom, and that my kids were all old enough when she died that they still have special memories of her. I am thankful for my momma-Mary, whom my dad married almost two years ago. She has graciously adopted us into her heart and loves us well.

Responsibility: I was reminded yesterday through our pastor's sermon what a responsibility we moms have. To teach our children transparent tenderness, authentic spirituality, inner confidence, unselfish love, and self- discipline. To model a life well lived, that they may follow our example. To show them what it means to trust and depend on the Lord, in good times and in hard times. To teach them how to treat others, do their best in all they do, and how to navigate this ever changing world.

Mother's Day is truly a day loaded with all kinds of meaning. And..... I'm not sure how to end this well, and it's time to stir the granola in the oven, make the bed and fold some laundry so I can win my laundry race with Jeana and Becky, so..... guess it's just done. :) No eloquent ending, no words to ponder, no amazing thoughts or bits of wisdom. Just the thoughts in my brain, now written out, and an ending that is definitely real life. :) Here's to authenticity. :)