Attitude of Gratitude Part 1

Once upon a few years ago, I read a book called "1,000 Gifts". Well, sort of. You see, I have a confession. It's very difficult for me to finish a nonfiction book. I don't know why. Maybe I need to read a different kind of nonfiction book. But generally speaking, I read enough of the book to get the gist of it, skim the rest, and call it good. So, I only MOSTLY read that book. In it, the author's focus is having a heart of thankfulness, even in the hard places of life, and how that can have such an impact on our attitudes and our very lives.

After reading that book, I kept a  gratitude journal for a while. In fact, I posted two different blog lists of thankfulnesses back in 2011, and if I was computer savvy, I would post the links to those lists right here...... But alas, I lack the skills to accomplish that task, at least until Reid gets home tonight :).

I took a long break from my thankfulness list - for no particular reason that I can think of, but started again a little over a year ago. I love looking back over the list. It brings back special little memories of our everyday life, and in the present, it helps me keep my eyes open for even the smallest blessings that God puts into each day. I'm up to 350, but I won't put them all in this post. Phew! That would be overwhelming! Here goes! The first 100. (Which, if I were to count the old posts from 2011, would actually be 300-400.)

Starting in the summer of 2013......

1. Finding a rock in Katie's jeans pocket. :)
2. Otter pops!
3. Folding clothes with Natalie.
4. Rosalie reading voraciously.
5. Cameron's sparkle back in his eyes after being sick.
6. Staying up late reading a good book.
7. The library!
8. Hummingbirds.
9. A juicy peach off of our own tree.
10. Deep red rose
11. Double Delight rose and it's intoxicating aroma.
12. Mail.
13. The quiet of morning.
14. Flexibility of summer.
15. Opportunity to spend time with my cousins.
16. Colors.
17. Blackberries.
18. Blackberry pie.
19. Yuka.
20. Time with the grandparents.
21. A day at the beach.
22. Hermit crabs.
23. Starfish.
24. Sea anenomies.
25. Little kids.
26. New life! (Cousin Lindsay's new baby, Ruby.)
27. Time with Hilary and Wendy. (My cousins)
28. All the little cousin's munchkins.
29. Watching Cam play with little Joe Joe.
30. A dip in Aunt Pam's pool on a hot day.
31. The refuge that Aunt Pam's house/pool is.
32. Family.
33. Time in the Word, worship with 4 church ladies.
34. Spiritual gifts.
35. Pillows - both bed pillows and pretty decorative ones.
36. A fresh new prayer journal.
37. Starting a prayer journal NOT in a crisis! (Means life is mellow at the moment.)
38. Breaks between trials, to build strength and rest.
39. Cameron's job.
40. Opportunities to trust God - for provision- and see Him answer.
41. A trip to Costco with my girlies.
42. Cameron able to drive himself to work.
43. Big stack of papers filed!
44. File boxes cleaned out and organized.
45. Rotisserie chicken from Costco.
46. Reid teaching a class (= income!)
47. Tamales!
48. French braiding Katie's hair.
49. Katie french braiding Natalie's hair.
50. MBTI test and conversation with each child about their temperaments.
51. A Mr. Fix It husband!
52. Working new water heater!
53. No more old water heater in the doorway of the laundry room.
54. A cleaned up, bigger feeling laundry room.
55. Rainbow arch with double rainbow.
56. Beautifully colored pre-storm sky.
57. Tilapia fish.
58. Cam going to Fred Meyer on a candy run. :)
59. Rosie getting to see Percy Jackson movie before the rest of us.
60. A sort of lazy afternoon and evening.
61. The Lord's provision - for our needs and beyond.
62. Juicy, yummy peaches!
63. Processing peaches with my friend, Lisa.
64. Orange sherbet paint!
65. Painting the girls room.
66. A fresh look for the girls room.
67. Replacing dark brown 70's molding with pretty new white molding.
68. Mondays! - Regroup, stay home, do laundry.
69. Rhubarb!
70. The smell of roses in the front yard.
71. The crepe myrtle blooming after 3 years.
72. Naps!
73. REBO Hatian coffee.
74. Reid's beautiful new office at Western Seminary.
75. Hanging pictures in Reid's office.
76. Seeing where Reid works.
77. Pepito's shrimp tacos.
78. A day with the kids.
79. Engine into the white Honda!
80. Again - a hubby who saves us thousands and thousands of dollars by being such a handy guy.
81. 2 kitties sitting by each other in the tree.
82. Cameron driving to school. (Ach! Really?)
83. Because of # 82, I have a few quiet moments with God before Nattie gets up.
84. Colds going a way.
85. Shopping day with Katie.
86. Katie buying a flowered skirt and pink shirt. :)
87. Shopping day with each of my girls by themselves.
88. Fog!
89. Fall weather.
90. Pouring rain.
91. Cozy blankets.
92. Paying off a big bill!! Phew! (Physical Therapy for Cameron's injury.)
93. New hairstyle.
94. Beautiful Fall leaves!
95. Blue skies.
96. Indian summer. (Sunny and 70-ish for weeks!)
97. Little personal notes to me from ARM Ministries donors.
98. Good conference for Nattie.
99. Good conferences with all Rosie's teachers.
100. Rosalie is doing it! Praise the Lord! She has all A's and B's, no missing work, socially doing great! Yay God! (6th grade)

Ramblings

9 months? I haven't "blogged" in 9 months? Sheesh! And so today, I sit down to write, but there is so much swirling around in my head that I don't know where to begin.

I heard on Focus on the Family the other day something that seemed to strike a chord with me. The speaker said something like "It can take up to three years to fully work through a crisis and feel like things are good again." It hit home for me. I had just been sorting through my thoughts and feelings about this very sort of thing. I am beginning to feel as though I/we are in a good, contented place once again. (I hesitate to write that. Does anyone else out there wait for the other shoe to drop when things are going well? I confess, I do. But I do know that life has seasons, and I can trust that whatever the season, God is right beside me, and will walk through whatever lies in my path with me.)

So what crises am I recovering from? Well, 5 1/2 years ago my parents moved to Dundee. It was a dream come true! The week they moved in, we found out mom was very ill with a form of "pre" leukemia, and prospects looked questionable. The next several months were full of chemo, grieving, spending every possible moment with mom, helping dad, trying to manage my own family life, etc. Then in November, pre-leukemia turned into full blown leukemia and Mom didn't qualify for a bone marrow transplant. Mom went home to Jesus on January 12th, 2010. That was close to 4 years ago. And I don't need to go into detail about all that. The purpose of this post is a focus on NOW, not then.

Then, a year later, Reid became a pastor, in January 2011. Then my dad got remarried in May 2011 (A good thing for sure, but still hard in some ways and definitely a transition). Then Reid resigned from his pastor position. All within a year and a half, all the while still reeling from and dealing with the loss of my mom/best friend/wonderful grandma. What a jumble of emotions and transitions and changes. Then Reid spent a year without a steady job, which was a blessing in many ways, and wonderful to see how God provided, but also a challenge and major lesson in trusting God. Things have settled down since then, though we still sometimes face and deal with all kinds of feelings surrounding all of those events. But mostly, we have journeyed through and come out on the other side of that valley. Thank you, Jesus!

Now all that stuff is close to.... you guessed it..... three years past. And I feel at peace. For now. But guess what. Another season of change is in the air. Cameron is a senior. I know my time of respite is brief. I know this is a joyous season, and something to celebrate, but that it will also contain grief and massive change. But I know that my God and my man will walk with me through it, and that in the midst of this season, as in all the others, we will encounter joy and blessings beyond measure mixed in with the challenges, changes and hard things.